Wrinkled Wit

Here is a list of things you need to know as you grow older. These secrets are not commonly known or shared, but they are important if you wish to successfully navigate life as you grow older.

1. You need to buy a rain gauge!  

  Nothing is more frustrating than not knowing how much rain you received at your house. When old men talk about the weather, we like to brag about the amount of rain we get, especially if it’s more than your friends.  

2. You need to buy 10 pair of the reading glasses and 3 of them must be the ugliest you can find!  

  The uglier the better! You won’t wear them outside the house for fear of someone seeing you wearing them. You will never lose them!

3. You need to learn how to play “Charades.”

    Have you ever watched old people having a conversation? It quickly turns into a guessing game. Example:

         “What is the name of the lady down the street?”

         “Which one, there are many?”

         “The one who had the dog, What is her name?”

         “I don’t know!”

         “Yes you do! It begins with a ‘K.’  Her son is a preacher!  You know……!”

               (some hand gestures’ at this point)

         “Does she drive a red car?”

        “Yes, that’s her! And last year she put up blue Christmas lights….What is her name?”

      Well, you get the idea.

4. Always keep an “Atomic Fire Ball” in your pocket.

   If you start crying for no reason at all (and you will) and some one sees you and is wondering what is wrong. You pull out the Atomic Fire Ball and ask them if they want one, great way to diffuse the attention.

5. Learn to laugh at yourself.  

    Spending 10 minutes looking for your car keys only to realize that you are holding them in your hand is not normal, but it is funny! So go ahead and laugh at yourself.

6, Memorize Proverbs 16:31.

     Maybe you should write it down and put it on your refrigerator, in case you forget!

  “Gray hair is a glorious crown; it is found in the way of righteousness” (Proverbs 16:31). 

   Wear your crown with confidence!

THE POINT: Life changes us as we get older. The things we once valued are no longer important. There are some things we can no longer do and there are some things we never thought we would do.  But in an ever-changing world, God does not change! Nor should our love and fear for God ever change. Whatever your age, Proverbs 9:10-11 will always be true.

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. For by Wisdom your days will be many, and years will be added to your life” (Proverbs 9:10-11).

This entry was posted on March 1, 2012 at 7:26 pm and is filed under Blogs. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments. You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.